Episode 4 of the Black Girl Dangerous podcast is here! Listen to Black Girl Dangerous herself—Mia McKenzie—and guests Shaadi Devereaux and Travis Alabanza discuss How To Get Away With Murder, the flopping of the whitewashed Stonewall movie, how to deal with racist white friends, Empire and more!
Full transcript below!
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FULL TRANSCRIPT:
Mia: Welcome to the Black Girl Dangerous podcast. I’m Black Girl Dangerous, Mia McKenzie. This week on the podcast we’re gonna talk about the recent flopping of the white washed Stonewall Movie, our thoughts on last week’s premiere of How to Get Away with Murder, and we’re gonna answer a BGD fan’s question about racist white friends. And later @twitterhoney will be here to talk about Empire and she and I will offer some predictions for things we think might happen this season. You don’t wanna miss any of this.
Joining me now is my British homie, Travis Alabanza. Hey Travis.
Travis: Hey, how you doing?
Mia: I’m well. How are you?
Travis: I’m good. I’m good. Had a little uni stuff today and college stuff so I’m a bit tired, but I’m excited to talk. How was your day?
Mia: My day was pretty low key. I had some… My cat got injured recently. I had to take her to the vet yesterday or the day before, because she some how had this weird injury that I didn’t even know about so because cats get into things. Basically I was picking up the cat and I felt like this weird, it felt like some kind of strange thing on her chest, like a bumpy kind of lumpiness. I was like, “what is this, what is going on?” So I lay her down and I’m looking in her fur and I can see some dried blood in her fur and I’m like, “Oh no!!! Kitty, what happened??!!” And I’m trying to see what it is. I’m feeling it. It feels like something is burrowed in her skin or maybe it’s just dried blood. I can’t decide what it is. She’s being very nice about it. I’m touching it and squeezing it and she’s chill, “like whatever, what are you doing? Ok, fine.” Until she gets sick of me and then she’s like, “Ok I’m going away now.” But she didn’t seem to be in pain or anything. So I took her to the vet the very next morning and she had somehow ripped a little hole in her chest somehow and the vet was like, it’s probably that she got caught on a nail or something. It was like a superficial wound. But her skin was broken open and somehow she had got a clump of her fur stuck in it so it hadn’t healed. Now it was infected, so she was super chill at the vet and they didn’t even have to sedate her to do – they shaved around it and were poking at it and pulling clumps of hair out of it and she was basically just laying there like, “Ok, whatever.” And it was so cute because I felt so proud of her (laughs), like I felt really proud. We could hear other cats in other rooms wailing, and just being very, ya know, uncooperative, and my cat is just laying there like, “Alright, this is fine.” And I was just like, “Oh my god. I have raised such a wonderful, chill as fuck ass cat.”
Travis: I’m about to say, cuz if that was my cat, you would hear it all the way over in the states. (laughter)
Mia: Right. And most cats. But my cat is just super chill. So, now she’s home and I have to – she has a little, little staples holding it together a little bit, cuz it can’t be completely closed because she has to – because it’s infected and needs to heal a little bit first. And the anti-biotics need to work first. So I have to put a warm compress on her. She just lays there and lets me do it. So it’s good. So taking care of a cat and otherwise, tired, but good.
Travis: Did you watch the How to Get Away with Murder premier?
Mia: I did watch the How to Get Away with Murder premier. Did you watch it?
Travis: No, so, confession, I don’t watch it and it’s a confession because my mum is addicted to it. So although I didn’t watch it, I had a live stream of tweets from my mum.
Mia: (laughs) So your mom just is sending you tweets about a show that you don’t even watch and you don’t even know what’s going on?
Travis: Right, which is why I am kind of excited to hear what you have to say because all I’ve got from texts from my mum – and I got some good ones up when I knew we would be talking about it – is, this is from the end of season 1, because I hear it didn’t end that long ago. Well it didn’t in the UK. And she just goes, “Oh my god. “Leela? Lola? I don’t know, “Frank! Frank!” Exclamation mark, “Frank!” (laughter) and when the premier comes she goes, “Oh you need to watch this. Oh you need to watch it.” And then just, “Viola, Viola, heart, magic.” That’s all I’ve got. (laughter)
Mia: Oh my god, I’m just imagining you getting these, and you like, “What??? Ok mom.”
Travis: And it’s cuz none of her friends watch it. So she’s really trying to get me into it so she things she’s sending me hooks but really I have no idea what’s going on.
Mia: Right, right. (laughing) Oh my god, that’ amazing. Well it is very exciting. Like I, I would say that last season was the first season and I felt like it actually got off to a pretty shaky start and about half way through the season I was like, “I’m not watching this anymore. I’m sick of this show. These law school kids they get on my nerves. They are annoying to me. Me and my wife got very annoyed with it and stopped watching it. And then a couple of months or so later, I think we were bored and we were like, “Oh let’s watch it, this is all that’s on, let’s watch it.” And it was great and we were like, “What the fuck???” We were like, “This show got so good.” And then we watched it. And up until the season finale it was on point. It was bangin’. And we were so so into it. So we waited for the premiere, which happened last week, and it was great. It was really, really cool. It was great to see Viola again, especially after her Emmy win and all the things, and it was, it was really good. It was super duper entertaining. I feel like it’s a really solid, good, entertaining show. And this week among other things that happened, Famke Janssen, was on the show. You may know her from the X-files – not the X-files – you may know her from X-Men. She played Jean Grey in the X-Men movies. She was introduced as Annaliese’s friend from college and it got real lesbionic up in there. Like it got super lesbionic. But not just any kind of lesbionic, but it got 50 year old woman lesbionic, which is what’s really dope about it. Right, because –
Travis: Real.
Mia: I mean we see women gettin’ it on, on TV. Like these days it’s not all that shocking to see that. But they are all 25 year olds. They not are not even 35 year olds. They are not young women. And a lot of times what we see is young women, you know, girl on girl action, that’s designed for the male gaze. That’s how it’s presented and it’s a certain kind of woman, with a certain kind of look, and this is not that. This was two 50 year old women, super attractive, super sexy, 50 year old women, gettin’ it on. And I have never seen that on TV before. I mean, it’s possible that it happened somewhere and I just missed it, but I have never seen it before, nobody I talked to had ever seen it before, so it was definitely new to me. I was very much here for it. I was super here for it.
Travis: And is it on a mainstream channel in the states? Cuz if so like, that’s extremely dope for representation.
Mia: Yeah, it’s on ABC or something. It’s on a major, major network. It’s a major, major show. It’s a hugely popular show. It was just dope to be able to see that. Especially since one of those women is a dark skinned broad nosed and kinky haired – kinky haired under her wig (laughs). She wears wigs on the show but sometimes she takes the wigs off and shows her actual kinky hair, which also never happens on TV – on network TV. So I’m here for it. I’m here for all of it. I really feel like after last week’s Emmy win, and now with this, I feel like Viola Davis is just taking us all sorts of places that we need to go.
Travis: Real, real.
Mia: I feel like she’s just the one. She’s holding out her hand to us and is like, “Come on, come on, come on wit me.” (laughter).
Travis: She knows we’re there after the speech, waiting, and we’re there watching and she gets us. She gets us.
Mia: She really does.
Travis: And what’s great is – It kind of makes sense. My mums texts, I don’t know when it happened – that episode. But my mum’s texts like started out with like, “Ok, I’m watching it…”, “Oh hey Viola…”, “Hot Viola…” And then it was like, “Oh my god, you need to watch this.” And I feel like that must have been those savory moments with my mum trying to do the commentary for me.
Mia: Right, right. Yeah, totally. It’s so great. I’m very much enjoying seeing everything that Viola Davis is up to. And I love that she, I just love that she, she gets to be sexy on national TV. You know. After being… And she’s talked about, after being relegated for so long to roles that she could never be that, and you know, getting to see her be that now at 50, on this national stage is just amazing and I’m just loving every second of it. It’s great.
[transition music]
Travis: I don’t know if you heard, but the shit show that is the Stonewall movie that just came out. Which I didn’t go to see and by the sounds of it, a lot of people fought it and didn’t because they only took in, I think it was 100K, out of the 17 million. So like it completely tanked at the box office and I’m so happy about it.
Mia: Yeah, definitely, yeah. I did hear about that. It’s a total failure (laughs) of epic proportions and I can just say, “Praise Jesus, through him all things are possible.” And by Jesus I mean, QTPoC Twitter, basically. (laughter).
Travis: Real, real. That’s the real Jesus up in here. (laughter)
Mia: Yeah, but I’m glad it flopped. You know. I feel like the whole, no one will go see it if it doesn’t have white leads thing, is false and it’s playing it out. You know, and that was basically what the director of this white washed Stonewall, like his whole reasoning, was just like, “Oh well we have to have a white leading man because otherwise no one will see it.” And they always see that shit, but in reality Latinos go to the movies more than any other group. Black people watch more TV than any other group. Right, so the Obie can’t make money if we don’t cast white people line is not holding up.
Travis: Real. It’s old. It’s boring and it’s also not true. None of us wanted to go and see some John go and throw some ahistorical crap brick. That’s not what we wanted. We knew from the posters from the beginning that QTPoC Twitter was not gonna take to this and so beautiful to see it tank. I kind of was just like, this is now – not that we needed any more proof – but now it’s like we have power in the media narrative. We can make your film tank if you don’t show up and make a film that’s reflective of our history.
Mia: Exactly. And of all things, Stonewall. I mean I’m really grateful for social media for so many reasons, but one of the reasons I think is because we do have so much more power because of social media, because people, when people are talking about this movie from the second we find out what it is, and how they are trying to present it, people were like, “No, like, NO.” And having that face for everybody to come together and be like no, we’re not, we don’t support this, this isn’t what we want, we have to boycott this. And then to see that play out in this amazing wonderful way, is great.
Travis: Real, and like, what I loved is that so many times in Twitter narratives, I see from being over in England, is that we often look from the sidelines to U.S. hashtags trending and then never act upon them, but it completely tanked here too. And, I was speaking to a friend and the local cinema of, we filmed, um Dear White People. And for all the problems that, that film had, we turned out for that. There were black people there, in the numbers, turning out for it. The best weekend they had and this weekend was Stonewall. No one was there. And it’s showing that even in Black British media, we’re not gonna take it. We’re not gonna stand for it. And, I think, I don’t know if you’ve heard but recent controversy in the UK have been around Idris Alba rumored to be the next James Bond
Mia: Uh hm. Right.
Travis: Real, right. So there’s been this real topic about how far have we really come. Last year Destiny was the 5th Black woman to direct a film that’s ever been in cinemas. We are still really far behind. And I think, what it said to me, and a lot of my friends were talking about it, is that these white people won’t even stand in the streets when our Black teens are being killed by the police here in the UK, too. But if Idris Alba is gonna be cast as James Bond, they are gonna protest and and they are gonna create things. Like, what the fuck? Like, legit, like really? It just shows that actually we’re not gonna take shit. And I hope that Idris Alba gets James Bond, because I wanna see them uproared. I want to see them mad.
Mia: I totally hope that happens.That we just keep pushing it and pushing it. And, again, when I talk about social media and the power of it. That’s one of the reasons that folks want to disparage social media so much is because of the power that marginalized people actually have on social media to actually be able to affect change in this way. Huge things and small things and everything in between. And it’s great to see us using that power and really making things happen. And the same thing happened with… what was that movie? – Exodus. The Exodus movie. Where they have ancient Egypt and it’s all white people and Sigourney Weaver is the queen of Egypt and everybody was like, “No.” You know, people were like, “No, we refuse to accept this white washed shit.” And it tanked. It totally tanked. A movie with this huge budget and folks were just like, “No, we’re not gonna do it.” And I just, again, it’s just great to see. I just wanna – I hope that this continues. That we are able to keep this up and also at the same time be throwing more and more support behind film makers of color to make films that reflect us. And the same for TV and for web series and all of it.
[transition music]
Travis: We’ve actually got a question today, from Ashley in Massachusetts. They had a question for Black Girl Dangerous: “What do you do when your white friends say racist stuff?”
Mia: What do I do when my white friends say racist stuff? (laughs) So, I actually get this a lot. I get this question – I go around and talk to a lot of universities and I think I get this question probably almost everywhere I’ve ever gone. And my response is usually, like, “What do I do? Or what should you do?” Because if you’re asking what I do, I don’t do. I don’t do that. I don’t have white friends who say racist stuff. I have enough stressful shit to deal with in my life. I don’t need that. But I get that a lot of times young folks, especially if you’re at school with white people, you kind of have to deal with them. To a point. But really the best advice that I can give is to get better friends. Right. I mean, as people of color we’re taught that white people’s racism is a thing that we have to fix, that it’s on us, that it’s our responsibility to teach them to be better. And too many of us take that on. And I think it’s a huge amount of stress and so I advise folks to just don’t do it. I mean that’s the best advice that I can give. I think that you deserve friends who see you, fully, as a whole person. it’s bad enough having to convince strangers that you’re fully human, right. And just people out there in the world every day but if you have to convince your friends of your humanity, baby, get better friends.
Travis: I think I can definitely empathize as well. Being a young person, being still in educational institutions, surrounded by the mayo, and I’m kind of at the point where like, you never know where it’s gonna come from. And, friends is this really loose term, like, is it someone in your lecture, or is it someone that you are really hanging out with? If you’re spending time with them and sharing pizza slices then they’ve gots to go. But if it’s like this problematic person in your lecture, I’d say just move from them. Move. Sometimes I set up a wall. Sometimes I spot the racist people, well they are all really racist, but I spot the really racist ones, and just move. I build a wall around myself and I tell them, “Not today. Not today.” It’s a process. It’s definitely looking back, in the last three years, just how many white friends I Iose and lose and lose and lose. But with that, how much happier and safe I feel in the amazing community that I do find.
Mia: Right, yeah. My advise is just, fuck ’em. You don’t need ’em. For some people I think that could probably feel not super useful, like, if you really, really love your racist ass white friends. Maybe that advise isn’t super useful, but if that’s the case, I’m probably just not the right person to ask. (laughs). You know? But when I was young, I definitely, dealt with ridiculous white people. Right, like I said, we are taught that, that is what we are supposed to do. And at that time, no one had told me that I didn’t have to put up with that. Making room for white people’s fuckery is something that people of color are expected to do. So, you know, we’re not even taught to think of it as fuckery. Right, like, “Oh, they don’t mean anything by it. They are just joking. Etc. etc. etc.” And it doesn’t matter how fucked up it makes us feel, because they didn’t mean it that way. Or whatever. So, because we’re taught that the most important is white people’s comfort, even pointing out the racism is a no, no. Let alone, telling them to fuck off. Cuz we don’t want to cause a scene. And we don’t want to be the angry person of color. And I just think navigating that shit is exhausting. So really my advice is just, don’t. If you don’t have to, don’t. You don’t need that shit. Choose better friends.
Travis: Take care of you. Take care of you.
Mia: Exactly. Like if you want if you wanna give your white friends, if these are people who you feel like, are really important to you for some reason, and you wanna give them a chance to do better, then you can point them towards the library. Right, point them towards the Internets where they can find all sorts of information on how to not be so damn racist. Right, there are literally websites full of that stuff. If they want to put in that effort, cool. They might be worth hanging onto after they educate themselves. But if not, let them go and look for better friends.
Travis: Real. And let them not bring you into that equation of education. I think we’re so used to bringing whiteness into every single equation that we think that also has to equal our friendship, and then also has to equal us fixing them. Cuz that’s what it is, they make you feel like it’s you fixing the friendship that they’re racist, but no, it’s actually you are putting energy to fix their crap. If I’m honest probably isn’t gonna get fixed anytime soon.
Mia: Right, right. Yeah, put your time and energy into people who can see you. This is why I tell kids, when I am speaking at places and when I have time with them to talk, especially one-on-one, like put your time and energy into people who can see you. That’s the best advice I can give.
[transition music]
Mia: This is the Black Girl Dangerous podcast. Joining me now is Shaadi Devareaux a.k.a. twitterhoney. Let’s get right too it. Empire premiered last week. It was the first episode of the new season and actually by time this podcast airs the second episode will also have aired, but that’s good because we’re gonna not only talk about what we thought about the premier but also to make predictions about the season so you can listen to our podcast and see if anything we said was gonna happen, happened. If anything has come true by the time it airs on Thursday. So what did you think of the premiere of Empire?
Shaadi: It was interesting to see if they would be able to see if they would be able to carry some of the momentum they had from the first season and it looks like they will be able to do that, but my first thought was they are still doing this weird thing with Porsha, the assistant. And it’s only getting worse. So she calls Ferguson, Peterson or Paterson, or something like that – they just completely insert things that are just so unnecessary to just show you how hood and therefore, stupid, she is. They are going above and beyond with their anti-black misogyny. And then Lucious does it again in the prison. But finally we got some clap back from the Black women, even though she’s like a Republican you know. And I’m really trying to wrap my head around, the federal prosecutor, who wears a push up braw and doesn’t wear shirts under her suit jacket. (laughter), Like, I’m a Republican, but whatever, we’re suspending reality for TV right now. And she delivers, to me, what is the best line on the entire show, which is, he says, “you’re just gonna be Black bitch in some cheap shoes”, and she goes, “A Black bitch in cheap shows that will jam them right up your yellow ass. Is that how you want it?” And I was like, bitch, you just did that for every dark skinned woman in the world right now, even though I probably don’t fuck wit you. (laughter) Who is not wanting to say that to a light skinned dude?
Mia: Right, and she says, “yella’ ass” at that. She don’t even put the “W” on it.
Shaadi: Uh hmm. Exactly. I was here for that. I don’t know what’s going on with Jamal. I’m not really feeling this arc. I’m guessing he’ll get a redemption arc, where he’s like, “Oh my god, I’m turning into my father.” But he’s turning into this weird dom. He’s being xenophobic. This Latino dude is serving him, he’s speaking Spanish, and he’s like, “Tell him to go away.” Like he can’t, like I don’t know. He’s doing this dom thing with his boyfriend that’s really weirding me out. Like, where is this coming from?
Mia: Right, right.
Shaadi: I guess it’s his whole manhood thing, which is an issue I have with the show. Maybe I can’t relate to it, because I’m not a gay man so this whole, “I have to prove shit to people and my daddy”… I just… His daddy issues, I just can’t really deal with. This whole I’m a man now stuff. I don’t know what’s going on with that. Maybe I just personally can’t relate to it, but it’s getting tiresome. And he’s over identifying with this father. It’s such classic misogyny, cuz like Cookie is trying to look out for him cuz she sees stuff long term and he’s like, “Well, at least he put me in a trashcan to my face.” And I’m like, what???
Mia: What?
Shaadi: Like do you hear yourself right now? And who pulled you out of the trash can? And she reminded him. He’s like, he’s literally romanticizing the way his father put him in a trashcan. If that’s not over valuing masculinity, I just can’t take it.
Mia: Right.
Shaadi: Whatever that arc is, y’all can keep that. I’m over it and his daddy issues.
Mia: The whole Jamal – remember last season where he was like, hanging the dude over the balcony to prove his manliness to Lucious, and it’s so over the top. Or even the whole when he was doing – remember when like, I mean everything is just like so over the top and ridiculous. Remember when it was Jamal, not Jamal, what’s the other dude’s name, Jaquim’s friend’s robbed Jamal. And they are going up in the studio and they point a gun at him and he’s like, “I don’t care. I ain’t scared.” With this head to the gun. And I’m just like, watching that shit like, like really? Like, ok. Ya’ll are taking this whole, he got, he’s gay but he’s not a pussy thing so far, like dude can’t even be scared of a gun to his head, now, because masculinity? Come on.
Shaadi: Right, and I kind of feel like Lee Daniels has a lot of issues and he’s not quite as bad as Tyler Perry in putting all of his issues into his script but he’s pretty bad.
Mia: Right
Shaadi: Because they kind of do this thing where they pull trans narratives in it. But there actually aren’t any trans women in it, because everyone’s heads will explode. Basically, which is pretty much the norm for gay men or whatever. I think the most they do is say flamboyant gay men are on the show. What is it, the Real Housewives of Atlanta Laurence. So they call Laurence a flamboyant gay man, and that’s probably how, I don’t know if that’s how they identify, but either way they can stop there. That’s the furthest they can go. And then the whole Jamal as a little kid dressing in women’s clothes and heals, which boys do whether they, who are gay and who are possibly cis and who are hetero and cis. That doesn’t mean that you’re trans, but there’s kind of like this playing with trans narratives, while they are not really. We don’t see any of those characters in there. We literally have like every celebrity on the face of the earth in that first episode, without any trans characters. I would even take RuPaul at this point. But yeah, so I don’t know. That’s a little weird. I don’t know if that’s him playing out some of his issues he’s having through his script or what’s going on there. Because he’s definitely a misogynist. The whole thing with Terrance Howard, so like, they are talking about his issues with women and he’s like, well, if Sean Penn could beat up a woman, so could Terrance Howard.
Mia: Yeah, I cannot stand Lee Daniels. Cuz I do. I think he hates Black women, especially dark skinned Black women and he ain’t that keen on dark skinned Black men either. I mean he got a serious colorism issues. Serious colorism issues. It plays out on the show every week. The Porsha character is, really?? Like, is this, like how many times are we just gonna make her unsmart, uncouth, and there basically to be laughed at. That’s already old and tired. And even Becky who I feel, Becky who’s now, Gabby Sidibe, who’s now a regular, has an even more prominent role in the show, but I’m kind of afraid of what that’s even gonna look like because I don’t trust him with that narrative at all. The thing about the show is that I am entertained by a lot of things about it cuz it’s so over the top and trashy and noting makes sense and everything is trash, trash, everywhere. These over the top story lines. It’s super… It’s so bad that it’s entertaining to watch and at the same time, just below that, there’s this real fucked up stuff going on. It’s weird.
Shaadi: Yeah, I think we need to acknowledge that as Black, Latino, Indigenous people, we love camp. And Empire is camp. So, that’s what it is, but in between all of that, I would like somebody who’s a little bit, who has a little less issues or if you have issues can you leave them out of the script, because I didn’t sign up for this.
Mia: Right
Shaadi: That’s all I’m asking for, basically. I mean can you not right your anti-black misogyny into the script. Because Gabby’s character in the first season was horrible. They got a little better towards the end, they are getting a little better now, but I don’t really trust him with that narrative. I don’t trust him with trans narratives. I don’t trust him with. No. The only thing he can write is cishet men and cisgay men and the issues they have with each other. That’s pretty much all that he can write. And his gripes that he has with cishet men for not letting him in the club. That’s what Empire seems to be to me.
Mia: Right.
Shaadi: So it will be interesting to see what he does with Jamal and if he finds his little way. I’m sure he will. I’m not quite getting this Jamal/Lucious collab. I guess he’s just feeling the power is going to his head. I don’t know. Dude, he doesn’t like you. You’re daddy doesn’t like you (laughter).
Mia: Right.
Shaadi: The whole season was, you’re daddy was an asshole. He told you he didn’t want you he didn’t want you to run the company. You basically had to force yourself on him, like, he doesn’t like you. And as soon as he gets back on he’s probably gonna dump you again, that’s probably what’s gonna happen he’s gonna dump you again for, his other son who rides a hover board and is gonna take over. (laughter). What actually should have happened is that they should let Jamal – wait, is Jamal the oldest one?
Mia: Jamal is the middle one.
Shaadi: Ok, the Jaquim, the oldest one.
Mia: Andre is the oldest one.
Shaadi: Andre, the oldest one, they should let him run the company, but they should all support him and his mental illness, instead of just leaving him to that white lady. They should support him and his mental illness and not just being like, “Oh you married a white girl so you do your thing over there and you run errands” cuz clearly the rest of them need to be making music and he needs to be making the moves, but y’all need to be supportin’ him and making sure he’s taking his medicine. And even just the whole disability arc was so completely messed up. It wasn’t even like, he has a disability so he can’t focus and he’s – no, he’s like, throwing himself into the wall – I’m just like listen – just completely over doing it, this is why he can’t work for the company, cuz he’s mentally ill and this is what this means, he’s just gonna throw himself – it’s so problematic in every way.
Mia: Yeah.
Shaadi: Everything they do is so problematic. It’s so problematic and it’s so quick, because they can’t sustain anything for more than half an episode. Everything happens so quickly. So like Lucious hates Jamal, he’s not doing nothing but being terrible to Jamal and like, poof! He gives Jamal the company. And then Jamal has been suffering all this long time cuz Lucious don’t love him and poof! Now it’s like, “you betrayed my father, get out”, like everything happens so quick that there’s no foundation for it. It’s just a hot ass mess. (laughter)
Shaadi: Exactly! I’m like Jamal, can you sit down and look into the camera and walk me through this real quick. (laughter). And you know, Andre has a mental illness and he goes to Jennifer Hudson, who rubs her titties on him, and signs gospel and he’s good. I don’t know. What’s going on here? (laughter). And she’s like supposed to have sex with him and heal him through the blood of Christ, via her pussy, what is going on here?? (laughter). And then she’s just like, no, but she’s just singing him gospel. I’m like, I can’t take this. This is too much. I guess now he’s fine. All he needed was Jennifer Hudson, titties and some gospel music to lift him up or whatever.
Mia: I guess so. I mean. Yeah.
Shaadi: I mean fuck everything else. Like, he good.
Mia: Can we talk about the casting choice of Chris Rock as, what is his name? I don’t remember his name because as soon as I saw Chris Rock, just like, everything just, my brain just went, eh eh, who chose Chris Rock? The thug ass drug dealer that everybody has been so afraid of all this time.
Shaadi: So what is with this thing with people, Chris Rock and drugs. Like is he trying to play on Pookie, what is going on? (laughter) Chris Rock does not have to have anything to do with drugs. Let’s just give him a different narrative and we can all move on about our day.
Mia: I feel like in the scene where Chris Rock gets killed, I just felt like, he deserved it because of his bad acting. I just felt like, just put him out of his misery, cuz now he’s in this prison and he looks like he has no idea what he’s doing, like he ‘s trying so hard to act and it’s just not working because nobody, nobody would ever be scared of Chris Rock. He does not exude any kind of toughness, or thugishness, he’s just not scary. He’s not scary.
Shaadi: But here’s the thing, for a character like that you need don’t even need to be sending me thugishness, or ruggedness. I would have been fine if he was psychologically terrifying.
Mia: Right, right.
Shaadi: I was not really sold either. Like you said, it’s really quick, maybe that’s part of it, it’s formulaic, it’s quick, they move on, it’s a soap opera, you’ll deal. And that’s how they are dealing with us right now.
Mia: Do you have any predictions from what you take so far of where we might be going?
Shaadi: I have no idea where we are going because this show is so lacking in continuity. I don’t know. What is this weird dynamic between Cookie and Anika, where Cookie is her pimp all of the sudden or something. I don’t know what’s going on with that. Where is Anika about to fit in all this? Does she actually go with the brother, Jaquim? Do they actually go together?
Mia: Yeah, I don’t know. They seem to kind of have – I mean they seem forget about a lot of the threads. They’re like, “Oh we forgot about that”, and then move on to the next thing.
Shaadi: I don’t know, maybe they are just getting revenge, but then it seemed like they kinda had a little something in the first episode so I was like, hhhm, what’s going on with that? Maybe Naomi Campbell is gonna come back now that Lucious is in jail. I don’t know what’s going on with that. Hopefully in this season Cookie will start answering her phone. (laughter). I don’t know. If someone was like sending me texts about roses, I don’t understand how all of the sudden Cookie doesn’t know what roses are when her cousin took out a whole street corner because Lucious sent her a rose. So maybe she’ll start answering her phone and looking at her texts before someone sends her heads in a box. I don’t know what’s wrong with any of these people. (laughter). But we’ll see girl. I think that Lucious is gonna come back. He’s gonna get out of jail. They are all gonna unite against Lucious, but then they put him back in power, and then they gonna be like, “Oh shit, why did we do that?” At the end they are all gonna come together. Who the fuck knows, girl, I don’t even know. What are your predictions?
Mia: Like you said, it’s so all over the place. Most of my predictions are celebrity guest based because the show is obsessed with celebrity guests, first of all. My first prediction is that Lucious’ parents are gonna show up. Supposedly, they said something about his parents. He’s supposed to be an orphan. I think his father was murdered by the Nation of Islam (laughter) because Empire is so over the top. I predict that he’s not really dead and he’s gonna come back and he’s gonna be way worse than Lucious. Actually I think the way the celebrity guest are flowing so freely on the show I feel like honestly that he would have been played by Bill Cosby, if Bill Cosby, if people hadn’t stopped ignoring all those rape allegations, he would have been played by Bill Cosby and it would have been like, “Oh look at Bill Cosby playing a bad guy” kind of a thing. But now that’s over, Bill Cosby’s out the paint, so I predict that his father will be played by –
Shaadi: Somebody light skinned.
Mia: Well this is the thing though, you would think they would be light skinned, but this is Lee Daniel’s show. So I feel like there has to be a dark skinned man who is worse than the worst light skinned man. The worst person can’t be a light skinned man. That doesn’t make sense in the mind of Lee Daniels. The very very worst person has to be a dark skinned man. I predict that his father will be way worse than him and dark skinned. (laughter)
Shaadi: The true mastermind has to be a dark skinned man.
Mia: Right, exactly.
Shaadi: The core of all light skinned man issues is really, a dark skinned man.
Mia: Exactly, exactly. I predict he will be played, possibly by John Amos, maybe Lou Gosset. Lou Gosset may make his come back as the father of Lucious Lion. We’ll see. But in any case he’s gonna be absolutely terrible and probably dark skinned. I haven’t decided who’s gonna play his light skinned mom. His mom is gonna be light skinned. She’s gonna be good. I haven’t decided who’s gonna play her yet.
Shaadi: I want Lee Daniels and Tyler Perry to write a script together and create a black whole of mommy and daddy issues and anti-black misogyny that will suck them into it’s vortex of fuckery and into an entire other universe so I don’t have to read any, or watch, or experience any of their writing ever again. (laughter)
Mia: But you know what I also predict, like I said, I don’t know who’s gonna play his light skinned mom, I’ll take people’s predictions if they have them, but somehow I feel like – and this is just an instinct – I feel like Jackée Harry is gonna show up (laughter) – you’re aunti who don’t know how to behave on Twitter.
Shaadi: Jackée, now let me tell you, now she follows me on Twitter
Mia: Ah! That’s wussup
Shaadi: Jackée is so lit on Twitter. She be really wit it. She’s real woke though, on the low. She will come for all of y’all, white supremacy, everything.
Mia: Uh huh.
Shaadi: Shout out to Jackée.
Mia: For real though.
Shaadi: I would love for her to be on this show. This is her type of show and she needs to make an appearance. And if y’all don’t have her on there, y’all trippin. Get Jackée. Cut her her checks.
Mia: For real. I think we got to get it trendin’, like, Jackée on Empire. If y’all haven’t handled that already, I feel like that’s something that’s got to go down. It has to happen this season. It has to.
Shaadi: I’ma tweet that right after this.
Mia: Aight, cool, cool. (laughter) Another prediction I have is that, all of my predictions are about family showing up. I have another prediction that Uncle Vernon, you remember Uncle Vernon who, they killed, Andre and his white wife. They killed him.
Shaadi: I forgot about that. Who was… Oh they were just burying him, they didn’t kill him. I thought they were like mixing the universes of How to Get Away with Murder and Empire. I didn’t quite understand that scene. I was like, what’s going on?
Mia: Empire last season?
Shaadi: Ok, so they were burying him.
Mia: Right, they killed him because, remember, uncle Vernon came and he and Andre got into a fight and they were fighting and breaking shit and then the wife came and hit uncle Vernon over the head with something and then he died. They was like, “Oh we can’t tell the police because, blah, blah, blah, whatever.” It didn’t even make any sense because they were like, “We can’t tell the police”, but she was a little white woman. Like, she could have told the police anything and got away with killing Vernon. She could have been like, “Oh my god, this big black man, he was turning into a werewolf and I had to kill him officer”, and they would be like, “Ok, little white lady, it’s fine.” There would not have been any trouble so I don’t really understand why they didn’t.
Shaadi: And nobody has asked about uncle Vernon. I think they asked about him like once. (laughter) And he plays a pivotal role in the company and every body’s like, “eh, all good”. (laughter) He’s probably chillin’ in Puerto Rico somewhere. You know, he’s good. (laughter).
Mia: That’s so true. So true. No one. It’s so like that show. But anyway, I predict that uncle Vernon’s long lost somebody is gonna show up and be looking for him. It might be his daughter.
Shaadi: They should let me have that role.
Mia: That would be good. You will play that very very well. I predict that if it is his daughter I think she might be played by Fantasia Barrino. That’s my prediction. Every Black actor you’ve ever seen in the history of entertainment will show up at some point in this season.
Shaadi: But you know I love Cookie. Big shout out to these women who are doing major things on prime time right now. They are really transforming stuff. Like, Meagan Good. I watch Minority Report the other night.
Mia: Oh yeah? It was good?
Shaadi: It would be so boring and so weak without her. It’s so amazing with her on it. I almost forgot that she was a great actor and a lot of these actors are good. I guess because they kind of pigeon hole them but with these prime time networks, Nicole, I don’t know how to say her last name. Baharie.
Mia: Uh hm.
Shaadi: They kind of give them the same roles over and over with these show now on network television. They are writing these roles that have more depth and complexity and just don’t reply on the characters Blackness and that’s all that’s there. They are really carrying networks right now, doing amazing acting, doing amazing work, you know, people are tuning in, so big ups to Black girls taking over television.
[transition music]
Shaadi: So we gotta talk about Michael B Jordan.
Mia: Yeah, we do. Last week on the podcast, you kinda dragged Micheal B Jordan. He got dragged by you.
Shaadi: You helped me drag him.
Mia: I don’t know. Folks, y’all can listen and see if I helped or not. Make your own decision. I’m pretty sure that I did not really help. I laughed. (laughter) And I stand by my laughing because it was funny. But yeah, Shaadi, dragged Michael B Jordan. And then today there was some developments basically that Michael B Jordan apologized for his fuckery and I read his apology and he was pretty thorough. It wasn’t one of those, I’m sorry if I offended you, but too fucking bad. Sorry, not sorry type things. It was pretty, he went there with his apology. What did you think of this?
Shaadi: I thought it was mostly a good apology. I should have known that somebody put something out because all of the sudden people – you know, colorblind Twitter – and fuckaway to racism Twitter, was in my mentions again randomly today. And then you actually sent the link right on time with his apology so I read that. And I was like ok, y’all can stop dragging me now. He apologized, we’re all good. I don’t care anymore. He admitted he was wrong, why y’all draggin’ me?
Mia: Right.
Shaadi: So, that happened, and the apology was kind of like, it was mostly good. I liked the part where he apologized for his misogyny and anti-blackness. That was cool. But it was kind of unclear to me about, the interviewer took it out of context, which I do believe a lot of what he said was probably taken out of context by interviewers and stuff because if you read some of the articles it’s obvious that they have no country for him. And they’re like, “Why do you have me interviewing this negro? I don’t even like him.” They said some this that’s wrong with him that they wouldn’t to other assholes who are white. It seems like they are making fun of him. At least the one or two that I have read about him. But I don’t know. So that happens and I am sure a lot of that is taken out of context. But you said, “All lives matter” or you didn’t and you know that was some fuckery. So I’m still kind of a little unclear on that. I do believe he said it cuz he goes back and forth like, “Yeah, I didn’t say it. It’s interpreted, but I’m sorry for what I did kind of say.” But I really liked his apology about anti-blackness and misogyny and I am really wondering who on his team, like what shea butter Twitter honey on his team, what Twitter girl feminist, body butter feminist, body butter Twitter. Who infiltrated his inner circle and got him together? Cuz that clearly didn’t come from him. It came from him, it’s authentic, but the language in that was real good and hmmm… Somebody in social justice Twitter and was like, “My dude, listen, let me write this apology for you and get you together”, which I appreciate. That he even recognized, “Ok, this is someone I need to listen to.” So Michale B Jordan, you are good, that is all I ever ask for, you can be with all the girls and every color that you want to, as long as you don’t drag the rest of us into your fuckery. And that is accomplished. Congratulations to Michael B Jordan. You are off of Shaadi’s shit list (laughter). For now.
Mia: So that’s our show. Thank you Shaadi and thank you Travis for being with me on the podcast this week. Thanks to everybody for listening. We’ll see you next week.
The Black Girl Dangerous podcast is a production of Black Girl Dangerous Media.
